Life Stories & how they continue on even after you die

I've sort of come to this conclusion several times over now in the past several months... You know sometimes your life story simply ends with no rhyme or reason - other times you foretell the ending before it happens. You've read the story before. It's not unexpected but it's not without bitterness. However the true comfort is that just because your life story has ended doesn't mean it's truly over. It will remain within the libraries that your loved ones carry with them. A collection of moments, experiences and encounters. So long as there are people here who still remember you and pass your story along, it never truly dies. It still exists, it's perhaps ended but people will still read it and remember it.

 — feeling incomplete.

Loss of people especially people you never expect to lose and secondly you never realize how much they meant to you upon their passing. It's like a puzzle and no matter what you do you'll never have the pieces. They are gone - and I will will likely never get them back. Loss brings so many emotions regret mostly - of missed chances and opportunities and of questions that will likely never get answers. However you sit there with your incomplete puzzle and you treasure the pieces you do have - the picture it does create albeit not fully.

Grief is such a tricky thing to try to explain let alone to begin to understand. With it comes so many things. It's like this unwanted Pandora box that you didn't realize would impact your life to such an extent. I will probably dig up my early posts about loss of loved ones that I wrote on the other two occasions that I came face to face with death earlier this year

I wish more than anything I could bring the people back I lost however I cannot do this - no one can. We must try to move forward as best we can even if we don't even know how that is. We have to try to find the lessons that each day bring us be it ones we never wanted to learn or those we so patiently spent mastering.

Life or at least ourselves are very much like magnets without the positives and the negatives we cannot live in one piece. We need a little bit of both in order to grow. We have the power within ourselves to attract things and dispel them at our own choosing.

So right now though it seems impossible I'm going to accept that today was another unexpectedly tragic day but there is something here to learn from - to grow from

You know sometimes your life story simply ends with no rhyme or reason - other times you foretell the ending before it happens. You've read the story before. It's not unexpected but it's not without bitterness. However the true comfort is that just because your life story has ended doesn't mean it's truly over. It will remain within the libraries that your loved ones carry with them. A collection of moments, experiences and encounters. So long as there are people here who still remember you and pass your story along, it never truly dies. It still exists, it's perhaps ended but people will still read it and remember it.

Losing people is NOT FUN

So back in May when my friend passed away I wrote a few different things with regards to Death & loss and what not. Sort of a way to cope and what not. However when I was writing those things in May I truly had no clue I would be referencing it so much afterwards.

I learned today that a Man I consider to be my Grandfather passed away yesterday. Mind you he was in his 80's and had an incredibly long & wonderful life - Living to see not one but two Great Grandchildren (3 if you count his step grandson) and luckily he was able to meet his Great Grandson in the fall and catch up with his Great Grand Daughter. In the end this is what he wanted - he more or less choose this time to leave us. But it's still very hard as he was a part of my life  for so very long. I became fast friends with his Grand Daughter when we were both five (We are 20 days apart in age thus both 23) and he has been in my life since. So that's what 18 years? My math is foggy tonight; my head is foggy tonight.

I really had high hopes for 2015 after such a really difficult 2014.
I had to come face to face with fire and deal with the after math of having had a small House fire. This was followed by the death of my Young friend (only 20) in May which proceeded my father ending up in Hospital for a month & going without a bathroom upstairs for 3 months. Well my father was in Hospital he became friends with his Hospital Mate (Like a roomate) Karl who shared his room for like 95% of their stay. Naturally we befriended Karl who didn't have many friends however he sadly passed away in July.
In the last few days of 2014 I had high hopes, 2014 was nearly done. I was ready to say good bye to loss & sadness. And then on New Years Eve I found out my cousin passed away.

Now the weekend of her funeral (I wasn't able to attend, my mom got to go I stayed home to look after my dad) literally the day after I loss My Grandfather Ken. So brilliant way to start 2015 hey.

Anyway
So anyway I will probably be posting lot's of my previous thoughts about my friend/loss/grief/dealing with death and what not...

The odd comfort of my cousin's passing is that her passing was a transition from Pain to being Pain free. She is in a place where her body is now her own and no longer plagued with cancer. However now it's her loved ones that are experiencing pain - the pain from losing her.

Chelsea's Guide to Household Inventory's

 HOUSEHOLD INVENTORY 101

Basically your Inventory should at the very least include Room, Item, Quantity, Price paid or Estimated price you purchased it for and a notes section.

My Inventory is slightly more specific. I included Room, Item category (is it Cleaning/linen/electronic etc), item (BE SPECIFIC) Explain Cleaning Wipes would become Clorox Jumbo Cleaning Wipes unscented, the quantity, the price you paid or estimated price you paid, notes on where you can find the Receipt or details on the warranty/proof of purchase, date purchased, you could even include a tab for Big appliances Like Plumber last worked on Toilet on this DATE etc, and then a section for notes. 

Here is a simplified Excel spreadsheet. 

The last two tabs say Price & notes respectively. 

Now some other helpful things to include would be

•  Photographs, and or videos as well. Noting the item in it's normal place & on it's own. 
•  create both a Digital and Hard (printed out) version of your inventory. 
• Make sure a second copy of your Inventory exists in a safe place Either electronically (USB/CD/Hard drive) this could be your safety deposit box or leaving a copy with Executor of your will, or with a trusted Family member or friend. 

Heads up guys I enjoy playing with Fake blood as a Hobby SO

Post by AUDFACED.

SO  this POST RIGHT here is a FABULOUS freaking way to start 2015! I HAVE ALWAYS loved watching Audfaced makeup videos and looooook forward to  her Halloween contests. It was always one of my BHAG reach for the stars won't ever happen dream of creating my own master piece of Horror FX and entering an Audfaced Halloween contest and VIOLA HERE'S MY ENTRY for her 2014 CONTEST! I AM ubber excited to even just get freaking show cased by her forget the long shot of winning, GUYS AUDFACED has looked at my MAKEUP WORK, LIKE WHAT even? I'm so incredibly excited. Honestly I never enter these things to win - always to challenge myself creatively and just branch out and take as many oppurtunities as possible. It's about learning, growing and just showcasing this bizarre little talent of mine. I've met so many fantastic people on IG through Horror FX and traded tips and just ohhed and awed at everyone's talent. 

BAM anyway yeah go check it out and show it some love on facebook if you would be so kind! 

Household Inventory Quick tips

Household inventory Woes 

Creating a Household inventory especially one that is meticulously over detailed and totally thorough and organized to a perfect T. It's a boring dull job that no one really wants to or ever thinks of doing. 

However when you end up in a crazy unexpected, you literally never thought you would ever be in. You never think about how helpful a Household inventory of all your stuff (Trinkets & JUNK drawers that are secretly Narnia's of Stuff included) can be when your starting into ash trying to identify the mishmash of black goo that was once your things. Nor can you believe how helpful it would have been to have an inventory of your entire personal library of BOOKS as you sit in your flood basement adding to the wetness with your tears for your poor babies. Imagine having to deal with someone not only breaking into your house but now on top of all that you have to figure out exactly what they took (Police like details & insurance people like proof of things) and your trying to remember where you put that receipt for that TV you bought during that sale last winter... 

Household inventories are a thing that someone should do as second nature. You should want to catalog your stuff. These are your best friends for when the unexpected does happen and will save you huge amounts of potential future stress if you ever find yourself facing one of these extremely stressful situations. Plus household inventories serve as Physical proof of your things so if you ever face a situation where you have to deal with things like Insurance companies/Restoration & endless documents. This gives you credibility that you can wave in their faces... 

SO these are my FAST FACTS and helpful starting suggestions that may even make this chore FUN! 

• Go Room by Room and give yourself massive amounts of time to finish say like a month 
• Divide the room up into small projects like Storage containers (So go dresser by dresser) or divide it into Object uses so say Cleaning supplies, linens. 
• Be sure to take photos of everything in the room as it is (including ceiling & floor and even walls) 
• Be sure you have a picture of each item where it is in the room & by itself... 

Are you struggling with this task still? Well why not take the let's get rid of two birds with one stone, approach. Turn this tedious project into a part of a Bigger project.

Option A - Will Creation 

tackle two tedious projects at once and make your Household Inventory and your Will (even if it's unofficial and just a typed up word Document) in tandem. They are basically the same thing you're creating lists of everything you own. This is a good time to take note of objects that of value (and could cause problems for people if something tragic happens to you.) When there is no will it causes Drama/frusteration/anger and can cause huge family fights. It's better to have your Finacacially high valued items designated to people, or requested to be sold & money split, or given to charities/museums. 

Secondly take note of sentimental value items things that you think people would like to have to remember you by. For instance I got a small mickey mouse Pin from my Great Aunt (She was like my grandma and I saw her every weekend kind of idea) when her daughter went through and gave someone something from her Non Valuable jewelry. I treasure it because it was hers & I got a piece of that. 

OR YOU could go WITH OPTION B  

 Make it part of your spring cleaning plan. 

1. Clean everything in the room & the room itself
2. Use those pintrest skills to do some Prime Organization creation projects. In each room is the room being used to it's best potential? If not how can you make that a reality? Figure out if there's anything You can either put aside to donate or sell and make some money (Everyone loves that right?) 
3. And well you're doing all of that or even afterwards then do your inventory (it will be the easy project after doing all the other stuff. 

Rantings on Why Household Inventories are Important

Chelsea's rantings on why Household Inventories are important 

So they say that your Attitude and how you spend today could be a reflection of how you spend the next year. In that case Blogging and Household inventory will be things I DO all the time. Something I have wanted to do post fire. Since you know a Household inventory would have been realllly helpful (not just a list but with photos but HEY an ACCURATE list at least) and solved lots of problems. However I wasn't smart and didn't think my little trinkets of life weren't worth recording PRE fire. In my head I was placing Household inventory with Wills. Yeah totally not the same (well very basic principal) HOUSEHOLD INVENTORY is RECORDING in thorough detail (With pictures if you can) a FULL LIST of everything in your WHOLE HOUSE.

SOUNDS tedious, sounds boring, but hey be pro active like me and make it a Household cleaning, sorting & donating project on top of tedious task of taking stock of your entire life.

Trust me when you go through an unexpected event like a fire or a flood (or whatever) and your sitting in a room that's a disaster zone and your trying to identify what is now a smoldering pile of things or your going through lists (you get back lots of lists & paperwork when dealing with Restoration/Insurance/household disaster) and You see ITEM Blank is missing from the official list even though you swear on your grave it was last in the contamination zone or you clearly remember the restoration team packing it away. Yet it somehow went missing from here to there and back and is considered non existent because it wasn't on a LIST and you can't prove where it truly last was physically seen...

Yeah When you're sitting doing that you will THANK YOURSELF or hate yourself all depending on whether you MADE THE GENIUS IDEA to MAKE A HOUSEHOLD INVENTORY of EVERYTHING. JUST ALL the things. NO JOKE because when you had 4 clorox Wipe packages but two were small and 2 were jumbo but only the 2 jumbos made it on the "LIST" You might be pretty irritated that you swore there were 4 cans of wipes but WHY OH why did you not have pictures. (this is a slight exagaration but legit point because when you're dealing with sudden Household emergency and things like Official list of contents is pretty essential because it's a list of What will and will not be monetarily replaced and that my friends is really one area where frankly if you are able to be fully compensated don't take NO for an answer SAY NO BUDDY no see here's my LIST and look I even included Photos & videos and things like date purchased/receipt /warranty location, exact quantity, or at the very least an ESTIMATE of what you paid on your nice official LIST.

You take that household inventory and YOU SHOVE it in all the faces and you BE PROUD of yourself. ALSO too this is also the perfect time to also DOUBLE tasks and prepare your will as well. Figure out if you want things to get appraised or if certain people pop out at you who mat want it if the other unthinkable thing happens...

Chelsea's Year of Change and her strange 2014 reflective ramblings

Chelsea's Reflective ramblings from 2014

AND HOW a HOUSE FIRE created CHANGE 

So 2014 for the most part was just not my year. I suffered the tragic loss of 3 people in my life (Will probably post more about the in a different post) the 3rd person passed away yesterday New Years Eve 2014. She was my cousin, she died of cancer and she left behind 3 children & her loving husband and family. The 2nd person to pass away was a man I visited every day in hospital for a month & visited him several times in Hospice including the eve before he passed, he too died of cancer. The first person I lost was my friend Austin. He was only 20 and he passed away in a  car crash when he was heading to work early one morning in May during a freak snow storm.

The other incredibly frusterating thing that happened was I had a "Small" House fire. Frankly the fire was the easiest part. One evening after a bubble bath - a candle I thought was blown out was stored in a metal cupboard where it reignited and set the cupboard on fire (Which naturally was the fire part) and it scored the wall.

The fire was not scary - not really. When the smoke detector first went off I assumed it was the stove as I had the kettle on for a cup of tea. So I was smart enough to carry around a boiling kettle and quickly came across the bathroom blaze. I quickly tossed the boiling hot water at the flames and jumped into the full tub (luckily I don't drain the tub right away) and was able to put it out fairly quickly.

I remember my parents were freaking out (natural of course) like OMG call 911 - fire - smoke AHHHH. AND  I am like NO ONE CALL 911 I GOT this. And I sort of did (PLEASE NOTE I DO NOT RECOMMEND YOU FOLLOW MY COURSE of ACTION. PERIOD! This was a small, very, small, contained fire that was mere inches from a vast water supply. Frankly if those were not the circumstances I'm sure it would've been different...

So not only did I go face to face with the wall of flames but I chased the smoke out my house (again CALL 911 air cleaning is part of the whole fire fighting tool that I stubbornly recjected.) I also assisted with removing the wreckage of the once was metal cabinet from the wall. This thing literally would break off (in still smoldering) pieces as  I pried/unscrewed/ yanked and tugged it off the wall and deposited it outside on my porch where there are still scorch marks from it.

 I also was totally determined that with total will power I COULD MAGICALLY clean the scorched/ash covered and smoke damaged bathroom. SO away I went playing a literal cinderella scrubbing and wiping and moping and just spraying and just doing pointless things...
ASH cleaning 101 kids NO WATER/No liquids...

So I spent 15 hours roughly in that little bathroom (Smallest room in house) trying to undo the massive mistake I had made. I literally spent so many hours in that stupid bathroom my skin was permanent shade of gray (2 baths, 1 total body scrub shower, one rinse shower...) My nails were stained black for a week and grossly I was coughing up black ash for awhile afterwards (AGAIN DO NOT DO WHAT I DID...)

Eventually when it came to me trying to clean the smoke stains from the ceiling I admitted my defeat in a fit of tears and allowed my mom to call insurance.

WHICH IS where the real hellish nightmare began. You know in school they always teach you about Fire precaution, fire safety plans, what to do if you catch on fire, how to put on stove fires, evacuation plans, you know how this BEFORE FIRE and During Fire but they fail to teach you about the practicality of POST FIRE 101 How to deal and what to do.
I was never taught about how to make a total/thorough Home inventory (Even pointless not so valueable crap) because oddly enough a bathroom is sort of one of those places where you put a huge assortment of things. It's the room of so many things with so many purposes. First aid, personal care items like soap/shampoo/brushes & ORAL care stuff like mouth wash/retainers/dental floss, then you have cleaning supplies, first aid kits, medications, and Beauty things like MAKEUP (including your entire collection of nail polish & EXPENSIVE perfume, stuff like body lotions. And then you have decor stuff & permanent fixtures (like towel racks.)
A persons bathroom is like a giant Narnia like vortex where every inch is consumed with a VARIETY of things.

Now you're suddenly juggling phone calls from Insurance, inspectors, restoration, restoration crew. And suddenly a rag tag crew have arrived with boxes and you have to hear them tossing/throwing or grimace as they sort out, pack up, toss out, and haul away your stuff. AND YOUR MIND is still reeling going WOAH my house still smells of smoke. OMG wait where did my beloved OPI James Bond Sand collection bottle of Pussy galore go. Where was my first childhood tooth kept (in my bathroom or the bedroom) and your stuck trying to make an inventory of your things from memory, guessing by deduction or from the pictures you took of the Kitchen posing as your new bathroom area...

See with restoration part comes confusion - misplaced items that are now neither here nor there, and were never added to official lists yet from your own inventory & Photos & even video proof you can 100% say that yes that item was in that bathroom, no the item that was in my makeup dresser was in no way fire damaged warranting decimating due to contamination & I SWear UP AND DOWN It's no where else in my house, and the last time I saw it was in that dang bathroom pre fire...

Also without an Official Inventory with no videos/photos of proof of existence nor receipt type info, date purchased, and value worth there comes DISPUTE and red tape... Mostly red tape and a bit of dispute and crap like Depreciation of value...

Like The $100 bottle of missing Juicy Couture is listed as questionable even though I had pictures of the soot covered bottle because the restoration company somehow lost it or didn't properly document all of our contents. Thus it cannot be replaced. My mom's cacti that sat on the window sill below her handmade as a child irreplaceable Window clings were also listed as non existent... Though I actually remember listening to the workers smash the hand painted cactus pots into boxes as they cleared out the bathroom.. Kinda hard to forget the sound of breaking plant pots...

Another big issue was our toilet not just the fact my Main living floor upstairs went without FOR THREE MONTHS (yes it took that long to go from a smoke ruined room, to a gutted out shell, to back to full restored status with working plumbing (literally toilet/bathtub is last things to be done...) Our toilet had literally been replaced within a 1 year period of the fire... We had receipts/plumber too, and pictures of make and model. It was a specialty higher up model for my dad to easily use... NOW did we get our toilet restored with same make & model - NO we got the really tiny in comparison apparently crap model downgrade (literally has flooded & clogged to the point where we've called a PLUMBER twice & had 2 minor floods SINCE JULY) And yet we're told well Ma'am sorry we were only designated a certain amount to spend on the toilet... Budget...cough.red.tape.cough... UM what about the contents insurance? "that doesn't always cover permanent plumbing fixtures..." OH cool so the like you know several hundred we invested in that toilet were basically just for short term kicks and you you gave us the 200 dollar Sale item? SWEET.

So this my friends is where I am putting into effect one small portion of  my over all plan of what I am calling Chelsea's YEAR of CHANGE. MAKE a freaking DETAILED & thorough PERSONAL HOUSEHOLD INVENTORY with word documents/photos/videos/and including info like date purchased/where/receipt/warranty.)  
SO next time the horribly unexpected and nightmarish situations should EVER occur (or you know something like a flood or w.e) and you have no choice but deal with INSURANCE/REstoration you can have proof and lists to back everything you claim up!!!!

SO KIDS lesson of the sad story that was Chelsea's 2014 Never ending nightmare - Don't use candles in the bathroom or SNUFF them out and stare for a few minutes... OR follow me on my journey of creating a PERSONAL HOUSEHOLD INVENTORY  WHICH IS just one tiny part of CHELSEA'S YEAR OF CHANGE!